Wow! What a weekend! I turned 40 yesterday and my husband was just amazing at planning the perfect birthday event for me.
Early Saturday morning, my son Brendan and I headed out to run in the Race for the Cure with our friends Coach Mark and his wife Sharon and their baby granddaughter, Addie. We had a great time! This was Brendan's very first 5K and he ran the entire thing! I was so proud of him that I was almost in tears as we crossed the finish line. I stayed with him the whole time, cheering him on and he finished in 32:41:58. It was great!
Afterwards my husband had me meet him at our box where he had planned a surprise birthday party/WOD for me with my friends and family. See? a perfect day!
But yesterday was THE day. The day I turned 40. The day that I had said would be the day I would achieve that goal. The muscle-up.
Didn't happen.
Last night I was almost in tears. No. I was in tears, but I got control of myself quickly.
I had made this day so big in my head. Why? I think it's because I didn't want to focus on the fact that I was turning 40. My idea was to take this day and make it very positive. Make it a day that I did something that I have never been able to do before.
At one point yesterday I even asked myself, "Do I feel different?"
Yes.
OR did I just feel disappointed?
I have been thinking about this for the past 2 days.
Honestly, what the heck is my problem?
Why in the world am I letting this one thing bring me down?
I was having a pity party and I was the only guest!
Yes, I wanted yesterday to be a day that I did something that I have never done before, but wait! Don't I do this almost every day?
Let's talk about what I was doing 20 years ago.
I can tell you that when I was 20 years old, I was an art student who was constantly working on art projects, sometimes all hours of the night, and then going straight to class with no sleep. I actually went 3 days without sleep during finals one semester and had a professor tell me that if I showed up in his class that day, he would fail me. I was in bad shape that day.
I also drank often, (College, right?) ate bad food-Hardees everyday for lunch! Gross! And I smoked at least a pack a day. When did I work out? I didn't. If I wasn't in class, I was working (I had 2 jobs) or working on a project or hopefully sleeping some.
Yeah, I could totally kick my 20 year old butt now!
I can tell you that I couldn't deadlift much, couldn't run even a 15 minute mile (smoker!), didn't even know what an "Olympic Lift" was, and pullups? Well, that was just for boys, right?
But I was skinny and that was what counted, right? Never mind that I was always close to exhaustion and malnutrition.
So, let me re-evaluate this.
At the age 40, I am doing things I never would have thought I could do! I haven't smoked in almost 12 years. I eat real food and am in the best shape and best health of my life. I am a mother of 3 amazing boys and the wife to the love of my life! I love ALL of my jobs (mom, CrossFit Coach and Graphic Designer) Life is good! 40 is sounding better and better! :)
My message for the day? Don't get so focused on the things that, in the overall scheme of things, don't really matter.
Yes, it is important to set goals, but don't become so obsessed with the goal, that you forget to enjoy the journey.
Saturday Workout of the Day
Run 5 K, then
Birthday WOD
4 Rounds of
10 Overhead Squats, 65lbs
16 pullups
25 Double Unders (or 71 singles)
Score: 10:47
I will be taking this week off and then I will be back next week to start a new strength cycle.
Dawn, I think you capture the essence of the struggle of all of us ladies who reach that threshold of "the big 40"... Do skeptically approach the "40" by narrowing focus to only one or two specific goals or do we joyfully leap across as if we are jumping those big puddles as kids to fund that the first puddle was small and gave us confidence to jump across a bigger and yet bigger one. What eventually happened is that we missed one, got our shoes (and feet) wet, and giggled and went on to enjoy another anyway. Enjoy your journey... I have no doubt that muscle up is so close you can taste it.... After your week's rest just decide how big a fork you want to use to take the first bite.... and whenever it happens, it will taste better than any cupcake GiGis has ever served!
ReplyDeleteLove ya --Sharon Smith
Thanks, Dawn!
ReplyDeleteI was just beating myself up over a rough workout and a week of being in a funk about a lot of things. Thanks for reminding me to take a step back and enjoy the failures and all the lessons they bring. Bumps and bruises just add character. This is an amazing journey we're on!
-Jo