SKINNY DOES NOT MEAN HEALTHY!
That being said, I am human and I get my feelings hurt, too. I have to admit though, it really pisses me off that I couldn't just shrug this off but instead, let it get to me. Especially when what was said to me shouldn't have bothered me!
Last week, I had someone very close to me, another woman, lovingly point out the fact that I had still have a belly.
Not a shocker! I mean, it's not like I didn't know, but it hurt my feelings just the same. I said as much and she told me that she didn't mean to hurt my feelings BUT she was taking these appetite suppressants and maybe I would like her to get me some also to help me get rid of the rest of my belly.
FEELINGS VERY HURT!
And do you know what makes me the most upset?! The fact that for a split second before I shut her down, I was willing to hear about these pills. WHY?
If someone from my gym had told me that this had happened to them I would have come UNDONE! I would have been so upset! Then I would have spent the next 30 minutes explaining to them that SKINNY does not mean HEALTHY! Pills are NOT how to lose weight and blah, blah, blah!
So why didn't I have this immediate reaction when it was suggested to me that I needed help to lose my belly? I think partly because this statement came from a loved one, but I think the real reason is because I, like so many of you, can not be completely satisfied with how I look.
Why do we do this to ourselves?
I have never been that girl with the eating disorder. Mostly because I enjoy food too damn much! What I have always wanted though, was an athletic build. A body that, when people saw me, would know that I worked hard for it, not wonder who my plastic surgeon was. (DISCLAIMER: I have nothing against plastic surgery, it is just not for me.)
Up until a few years ago, I didn't do the work to get that body, so I had no reason to be upset that I didn't have it. So, I wasn't.
If you don't work for it, you can't expect it, right? RIGHT!
After the birth of my 3rd and last son, I got serious though. I started working out 6 days a week doing something you may have heard of, P90X. This was perfect for me at the time. I had a newborn that I couldn't take to the gym and with this, I could work out at home. I did this for 3 years, every day. (YES! You read that correct) I measured myself monthly, weighed myself, took the before and after pictures. You name it! Over those 3 years, I saw my body begin to change and reward me with my hard work.
THEN I discovered CrossFit and my life completely changed!
I also discovered I wasn't near as strong and in shape as I thought I was. My first CrossFit workout handed my ass to me...and I loved it!!! As a result, I saw my body change more in the following 3 months than it had changed in the past 3 years of P90X. My arms, my legs, my shoulders and my back all begin to change. For the first time, I was able to see muscle definition. I didn't even know I had some of these muscles. Very cool!
What was even better, was that I found my goals had begun to change as well. I was no longer concerned with the number on the scale going down, or the measurements, or the damn "before" and "after" photos. My goals changed to things like, lift heavier, run faster, get an unassisted pull-up, learn the olympic lifts, do push-ups correctly.
Losing 5 - 10lbs began to seem silly to me.
I felt amazing and fitter than I had ever been in my life! Wasn't that supposed to be our goal?
I also learned what my body was not going to do. I had always expected my body to respond to everything, and for the most part it did...except my abs.
I joke with my friends that I only have a 3-pack instead of a 6-pack. Those other 3 abs that will not show, I have named them Taylor, Brendan and Jordan after my 3 boys.
So then why the hell did this conversation bother me so damn much? I had accepted a long time ago I was not a 6-packer.
|Not a 6-packer|
|Reality = STRONG!|
|Not me! :)|
I laughed hard and said, "Girl, I have had three boys! There is no help for them expect for surgery, which I won't do."
She said, "The same is true for your abs! Everything else about your body changed as you expected with the exception for your stomach. Let's take a photo of those abs you think you should have, burn the picture and bury this crap!"
Well said, Cindy! So, for those of you out there that may be going through this same struggle, let's bury this crap! Love who we are! Be proud of what we are doing, and most important, don't let the hurtful words bring you down.
Strong is Sexy and Beautiful! Caring what people think of you...not so much.
You know better. I know better!
Be healthy, be fit, and most important, be HAPPY with who you are!